Imagine my surprise when I stumbled into a bar called Blo the other day and found out that for a mere $35 you could have anyone that worked there blow you. Yeah you heard me !! BLOW YOU on the cheap !! You get to pick … the hot brunette with the girl next door look, — VROOM!
Archive for September, 2011
A New Bar Where You Can Get Blown For $35? I Guess I Can Try It Out !!
September 28th, 2011 
Jason Whitesel Lesbians Take Down Plane With Heat Seeking Kissle
September 27th, 2011 Jesse Jones “Get these monkey fightin’ lesbians off this Monday through Friday plane!” The greatest threat to American air travel, right now, as I am typing this very important piece of internet fluffery, is not exploding shoes, or slightly larger than tiny bottles of shampoo, or the stinky guy. No, commercial air travel enemy number one, is — VROOM!
Posted in Busy Body, Gay, Stupidity 
Tags: airlines, dirigibles, excessive, kiss, Leisha Hailey, lesbian, Southwest, the L word 
No Comments »Monday Rewind (Van Full of Candy's Scratch 'n Sniff eBook)
September 26th, 2011 Jason Whitesel Sometimes when one is very sick, or just doesn’t feel like doing shit, well then, that’s when we recycle … Enjoy this recycled story from many months ago. Recycling … it’s good for the environment, and our readers. … The release of our first online eBook has actually happened and we’re pleased to share it — VROOM!
He Was Asking For It … Look How He's Dressed
September 25th, 2011 Van Full of Candy Poseidon should have worn pants … I mean come on !!
When Horror Movies Go Porn (Netflix Style)
September 24th, 2011 Van Full of Candy Hey kids, sorry about not posting anything for your junkie fix on Friday … here’s a little orgasmic Van Full of Candy teaser for ya !!
Posted in Comedy, Movies, Porn Tags: Bungalow Of The Damned, Movie Night, Netflix, Orgasm No Comments »One Million Moms Hate Balls
September 22nd, 2011 Jesse Jones During the winter break of my Sophomore year at the University of Nevada, Reno (go fighting Soft Sixteens!) I took a backpacking excursion through the inhospitable wilderness of the South American rainforest. I hiked for nine days with my trusty guide Tuo Uu-nu Eepchak. I was but a fool child, ill prepared for the conditions I would face — VROOM!
America's New Holiday: Execution Day – September 21st.
September 21st, 2011 Jason Whitesel Today, two men were lethally injected all the way to death, in two different states (Georgia & Texas) for killing another human being. Troy Davis, the African American guy below killed a police officer 22 years ago by shooting him when the officer tried to help a man being attacked, and Lawrence Russel Brewer, the — VROOM!
Posted in Comedy, Death, Guns Tags: Death Row, Executions, Lawrence Brewer, Murder, Troy Davis 1 Comment »A Big Week For Facebook, If Anyone Survives to See It
September 20th, 2011 Jesse Jones We like My[_____]. We like it because it’s simple and quiet and uncluttered by unnecessary things like apps or content or other people, as well as all of the reasons we’ve previously stated. I like to go to My[_____] when ever I need to be alone to think about how wrong it all went. It was while tending to our — VROOM!
Posted in Facebook, Headlines, Internet, Justin Timberlake, MySpace, Social Media Tags: Air Canada, Anthony Court, explosives, Facebook, Jean Grey, Justin Timberlake, Mark Zuckerberg, Martinkovich, MySpace, Rogue, Slash, Tom, X-Man No Comments »Sonny & Cher's Daughter … Watch Him Dance !!
September 19th, 2011 Jason Whitesel There’s been a few times over the last few months that I wanted to write something about Chaz Bono, and each time the slant was different. Not liking Chaz: pointing out Chaz’s silver platter and how using the Sonny & Cher platform to succeed was lame. Liking Chaz: for doing what Chaz was doing in — VROOM!
Posted in Celebrity, Comedy, Family, Questions Tags: Chastity Bono, Chaz Bono, Dancing With The Stars, Sonny and Cher No Comments »My Name Sucks Ass … And So Does Yours
September 16th, 2011 Jason Whitesel All of our names suck, yours, mine, his, hers, your grandmothers for sure. These ridiculous names passed down from generations, these middle names from an uncle who drinks too much, or grandpa who strangely smelled like Werther’s originals but had no teeth. Agatha, Bertrand, Prudence, Oliver, Sherman … Who in the world would ever keep — VROOM!
Posted in Comedy, Family, NBA, NFL, True Story Tags: Captain Awesome, Chad Johnson, Douglas Allen Smith Jr, Metta World Peace, Ocho Cinco, Oregon, Ron Artest 4 Comments »
