Happy goddamn 200th birthday Charles D., you ornery quill pen scribblin’ literary pimp. You’re lookin’ pretty good for being a couple Benjamins old, what’s your secret? Bikram yoga? Damn, that’s pretty badass Chuck. You don’t mind if I call you Chuck do ya? I tried that hot yoga shit once and damn near pulled my — VROOM!
Archive for the ‘Books’ Category
Sometimes when one is very sick, or just doesn’t feel like doing shit, well then, that’s when we recycle … Enjoy this recycled story from many months ago. Recycling … it’s good for the environment, and our readers. … The release of our first online eBook has actually happened and we’re pleased to share it — VROOM!
Hey you, portly meat child, put down that bacon glazed ham turkey and mash your thick, meaty fingers into the keyboard over here, I’ve got something to tell you: You’re not okay! Did you know that people hate fats. They do. Especially fat children. Nobody hates anything in this world more than they hate rotund rotoddlers. — VROOM!
The release of our first online eBook has actually happened and we’re pleased to share it with the world today. Van Full of Candy has partnered with technological powerhouse 3M to create the first ever virtual scratch -n- sniff eBook. After years of scientific study we have been able to harness the only ‘LCD touch and smell — VROOM!